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Trump Claims Fraud Over Past Failed Marriages

President of Vice, Donald J. Trump, the J. is for Jabberwocky, is fuming today and declaring that both his past failed marriages were rigged.

Trump has tied the knot three times, but he is trying to convince his loyal followers that the reason the first two marriages failed was due to its rigging.

“I have the best rigging. I am the finest rigger. Ask anyone and they will tell you, Trump is a good rigger,” said Trump before going back to his coloring.

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